Monday, March 09, 2015

of Fitriah's wedding

Assalamualaikum and hi.

It was on the 27th of January that she texted me, informing her wedding and asking (more like insisting) me to come and join her for the big day. Many of you might wonder, if we were close, why only I knew about the wedding towards last minute. Here's the thing, Fitriah and I have known each other in primary school, before she went to Sekolah Tun Fatimah and later MSU. We lost contact here and there but the conversation will never goes awkward even after years not meeting each other. Moreover, with me losing phone and changing contact numbers a few times making the meet and talk on and off. But alhamdulillah the friendship remains.

It was on 6th of March when I went straight from my workplace to the airport to catch the 8.30pm flight to Tawau. I met noraini at the airport as we have promised to go together. Carrying a backpack, she looked very fresh even though she just finished her meeting. I guess, constantly running a marathon makes her look energetic all the time. 

While waiting for the bridezilla

They were six of us. We have gotten really close in our final year of  primary school in SRK Holy Trinity. Each of us definitely has different character, from achiever, to devouter, to princesa-like. Westlife was the popular thing during that period. Typical 90's fangirl, we collected lyrics and bought stickers of them. One often brought newspaper cut of pop stars and the other will lend me their vcd of concerts. There were talks on whose the cutest, boys I mean. Plus, I could say that we were the teacher's pet as well, especially to Madam Yuhana. It was kinda cool because other kids feared her. 

After primary school, all of us went to different secondary schools and some went to different states. Three of us remained in Tawau. The other three went to peninsular. The conversation definitely slow-going, but never dissipated. The first to get married is Isrina, followed by Norazwa in the same year of 2013. Farah got married in March 2014 and now Fitriah in the same month, a year after. The only bachelor now is me and Noraini. 

The bride, Fitriah Roos

As we were waiting for the groom's entourage, I could see the bride with teary eyes. And I try to divert my attention by having conversation with the makciks and staring at the mosque's beautiful calligraphy. Then, I looked at Fit's father having the conversation with the pious leader on what to say and whatnot. He will be solemnizing the ceremony himself. That brought my mind to one sweet conversation I had with my father. It was the end of university's break, somewhere around 2011. We were on our way to the airport as I'm going back to KK and my father said "Pa ada bercerita dengan xxx, pasal nikahkan anak sendiri, senang juga rupanya". He sounded nonchalant. However it makes me smiling from ear to ear in the backseat of our car. "My father was thinking about my marriage, finally he must has seen me as a lady". But I guess that is our only memory on my marriage, happened in one second, one sentence.

My attention was taken away to a selfish part of my brain. I was completely shut down from my friend's wedding for a few minutes as I started to feel sorry for myself for not being able to have my father 's tenderness around my wedding. I felt like a bucket of tears banging inside my head begging to be free. I knitted my eyebrows so hard trying to hold it back. I should be saving the tears of joy for my friend, not being self-absorbed and drowning in my own emotion.  

Gang of bridesmaids. I did minimal editing to the photos. The lights and interior colours of the mosque are the reasons of my yellow-ish photos.

I do get a lot of question on tying-the-knot. Well I could say that so far there's no confirm plan yet. Casually I imagined on wedding, my own wedding. Well on wearing Elie Saab's dress, veil or no veil, train or not, or flowers. But when thinking on vow and solemnization ceremony, i happily avoid it. Being an only child, I have a small family, I embrace small crowd, I don't really have many close friends. Many get married, stay far away and lost contact with. It's scary and sad to imagine who will be there, who will perform the ceremony, who will slip a tissue in my hand if I start to cry, I bet my photos will be full with me sobbing, make-up cair and simply being ugly mess. And I wonder will it better if my father is still here. Gadd damn it anne, move on!

Moving on, on the night of 7th March was the wedding ceremony. It was held in Yuk Chin's hall. Family and friends attended the celebration. I was girrafe-ing my neck hoping to see familiar faces from primary school. But none spotted. I miss everybody tho. Hoping to meet my childhood friends from time to time. The bride was wearing a pink A-cutting gown with hair up-do. When we met her on stage, the bride said "penatnya kahwin". Hahaha. But you still look queen darling.

Kate Middleton much.

The day after, 8th of March, our weekend getaway ended as soon as we boarded the flight AK6267 to Kota Kinabalu.

Thank you Fitriah for having me. Congratulations on your wedding again. I'm going to miss you a lot.

I'm writing this with westlife songs on loop.

Till then. xoxo

Fitriah's wedding (7th of March,2015)



lilie .yangkangon said...

awww..ur picture all so beauty talaga! i love it!

nuranne (formerly simplyseoul) said...

lilie: salamat po. hihi.